day 141

Good morning and happy Monday wonderful readers! Sorry it’s been so long since I wrote a post – life’s been crazy busy these past couple weeks. When you’re a single mom, it feels like I’m going non-stop. Especially because my oldest daughter is in three extracurricular activities during the week, with another one starting in about a month. I’m grateful that I have the means to provide her with these activities. It’s something that would have greatly benefited my upbringing.

Since it is a Monday morning, I’ve been on the go all morning. Filled my gas tank, I’ve done three loads of laundry, caught up on dishes so I can spend time with my daughter after school today, changed my sheets – which is always a wonderful feeling. I also scooped the litter box and took the garbage out. Like I said, it’s never-ending. With that being said, despite all those things, I am grateful for my life today. These days, I have the energy and motivation to get shit done. When I was in active addiction, that wasn’t the case. I would waste so much time getting high, that in hindsight it’s embarrassing.

This past weekend, I drank for the first time in 140 days. I’m actually okay with it. I didn’t end up getting high, I limited myself to 4 drinks, and I had a good time. I didn’t wake up hungover, I didn’t do anything I regret, and I don’t have the desire to go drink more. I’m tentatively making the decision to drink occasionally. This is not something I have talked to my sponsor about, because Narcotics Anonymous is complete abstinence from ALL drugs – including alcohol. Tonight at my meeting, I will pick up a white key tag, the just for today tag. But I am still sober from my drug of choice, and for that, I am grateful. I will continue to attend Marijuana Anonymous, and may just switch to that fellowship, as it is drug specific. Of course with that being said, if alcohol does become a problem in my life, I will return to NA. Both my parents are alcoholics, and honestly I come from a long line of alcoholics. Mind you, I think it has helped me see what I never want to become. I know firsthand how hard it was growing up around alcoholism, enough to know I would never put my children through that.

That’s basically all I’ve got for today. I hope everyone has a happy Monday. Thanks for reading!